Friday, March 25
how moving can moving be? love of the most moving kind. when you cry just talking about it. is that what can be considered real love? when the rawest of emotions, most polarised, of ecstacy and sadness, engulf you all at the same time? i hope he loves you like we do! =)
seeing that sort of love unfurl before myself makes it all the harder to digest all that has been going on in me. it's easy to lament how life has rarely been fair to myself. ohwell maybe it is. but when it is also true that one action triggers a series of intertwined responses and consequences it is probably fair to say that each one of us are trapped in something of our own making, whether it be good or bad.
sanah asks me: any regrets?
ah. a moment of awakening. i do not like to think that i regret stuff. but i think i do. maybe we're supposed to believe in something beyond our control? that eventually all roads lead to one, and one that is worth being on? i don't want to. it's tempting.
i would do a lot of things differently if i was given another chance. well i guess that is tantamount to regret.
it would do me lots of good if i could let go. i feel the weight of baggage now. the more i add to the baggage, the heavier it gets. i think that pans out like common sense.
i can't.
any regrets?
the flame of hope, the basis of all existence. let it be the last thing to die.